I have just been reading into your advice on dating and relationships. Firstly I have to say, I am quite impressed. You seem quite knowledgeable. Despite this however, I feel I need advice on a more individually tailored level.
The situation is this. I am a 21 year old university student in my first year. I have met a girl who I have become quite interested in. She strikes me as being a very kind and friendly person, and has a very positive and bubbly attitude. I recognize the first step is to talk to her. This I have already done.
About one month ago I was trying to do something to rectify my tragic fashion sense. I figured the best advice I could get on this would be to ask the experts. So I decided to approach some girls and ask them if they knew where the best clothes shops where. She was one of them as it turns out. Then for the last month whenever I would pass her by or see her, she would smile or wave at me. Her manner would be quite shy as a general rule.
On the rare occasion I might even catch her looking at me, although I must admit, this doesn’t exactly happen a lot. Then last week, as I was contemplating the idea of approaching her, she approached me. Our chat was quite casual as you can imagine, and was interrupted by the arrival of her friends. From there I was a little left out of the conversation, although she did occasionally turn her attention back to me.
This leads me to ask you for advice on the matter.
My question is this. Is it possible she may like me? Don’t misunderstand me. I don’t blow my own trumpet. I recognize I don’t have classical good looks, and its fairly possible that there is that proverbial ‘tumour in my humour’. But, you never know, and I guess meeting a nice girl is something I haven’t completely given up on. I suppose I haven’t really given you much to go work with, so I will also ask you for a second piece of advice.
How can I find out if she likes me, without completely giving away my own feelings? I am in no mood for rejection anymore. I just need some kind of strategy to work out if my feelings are mutual or not, so that if in fact they are not, I can walk away with my dignity, and have saved face in the process.
I look forward to you reply.
She does like you and you don’t have to be so secretive and frightened…
Invite her to go fashion shopping with you, one-on-one and let that be the start to a wonderful romance.
Shopping, coffee somewhere…. An after-class snack break or two… fun local events to go to… once the ball starts rolling you’ll be fine.
And don’t be afraid of rejection here, unless you wait too long and she starts dating someone else because you seemed interested, then cooled off towards her.
Be more afraid of that little voice in your head that screams at you with each missed opportunity to ask her out. Being rejected is a whole lot better than never knowing what might have been.
All girls like a guy to ask them, not to “play games” about the first date and whether you like them or not.
The guy that makes the first move usually is the first guy to get the girl.