Hello Rob!
I hope you can help me with my dilemma.
I went on a first date with this guy. Before the first date he literally texted me or called me twice a day saying that he thought I was beautiful and sweet and that he couldn’t wait to see me. We finally went on our first date and it was wonderful. He kept caressing my hand and forearm during the movie. He put his hand on my knee and caressed it. I loved it and I realized, in my head, that he was right: we had an incredible connection.
He walked me to my car holding my hand and after getting over his obvious nerves he kissed me three times goodnight. (No tongue. Very sweet and classy) The next day I texted him, “good morning” and he responded, “Did you like me? :)” I told him, “yes”. I asked him if he liked me and he said, “NO! I kiss and hold hands with all the girls. Goofball! :)” Obviously, he meant yes but he didn’t REALLY say yes like I did.
Ever since then, he rarely calls me and he doesn’t respond to my texts right away. It has been about two weeks of this nonsense. I finally updated my facebook status generally saying, “I give up. I’m indifferent now.” I didn’t mention names but I’m sure he knew I was referring to him. Within the hour he sent me an email apologizing for being out of touch but that his mum was sick. I hope he’s not lying. He said that he enjoyed my company and thinks I’m a lot of fun but didn’t invite me for a second date.
What should I do? Ignore him? Forget him? Confront him about what he wants with me? Just to let you know, I’m 25 and he’s 41. I thought he would be too mature to be playing games like these. I guess I was wrong.
Any advice you can give me will be appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
K
Hi K,
The guy sounds flakey to me and if you continue to date him you’ll find that you’re not the only fish in his sea.
He showed way to much attention and pressured you to see him how he sees himself, which isn’t attraction is narcissistic.
He owes you an apology, but don’t expect more lovey-dovey attitudes without corresponding escalation of pressure on you to like/love him too.
If you do continue to see him, find out as much as you can why his previous relationships fell apart, that will be the big red warning sign I see in your future.
Best wishes,
Rob